Jesus’ Stone Cold Realism

About a month ago I had a business meeting with a female acquaintance. I say acquaintance because we never tried being friends. We met a few years back and there was an immediate mutual attraction. We tried dating, not once, but on two separate occasions but things never took off. However, this meeting, like every other time we got together while dating, went great.

Between the laughs and colorful conversations anyone could have assumed that we were either a couple or really good “friends”. As the night came to an end she told me:

“Hey, we should do this again sometime.” I looked at her and said,
“No we can’t.”

Given that we had a short lived romance that elephant will always be present, making things awkward and not letting a real friendship ever grow.

Can a friendship really exist between a male and a female? Sure it can, you have parents and siblings, those will be the best opposite sex friends you will ever have.

HERE’S THE THING: I’m against using something as inviolable as a friendship to get close to someone with the hope it will escalate into something more. It happens!

Don’t be naive and think that Nancy/Joseph have never thought of hooking up with you on more than one occasion. Males and females are meant to get together and reproduce. There is an animal instinct in both males and females that heightens the urge to hook-up and it does not forgive if you’re a “friend”.

Ever had a “friend” that suddenly becomes distant or disappears from your life when they meet someone and get into a relationship? Of course you do! Now ask yourself, was that a real friendship or was it just a front to get close and see what might happen one night. I know two people that were so called “best friends” for more than 10 years. All of a sudden they’ve decided to become a couple. Was this always a friendship or was it an attraction that kept them close and they finally gave in?

The way I see it, if you think friendships with the opposite sex are possible then continue to enjoy them.

But if you’re faking a friendship just to find a way in, grow up and let them know that you’re interested.

Agree with Jesus? Drop a comment below or take a vote here>> and don’t forget to tweet with him @OhMy_Jesus.


  1. Travieso

    Hey man, You have some interesting points here … A man and a Woman can barely be true friends. Also, judging by the experience you shared, probably you made the right decision but probably you didn’t. It’s a 50/50 chance of either way and a choice had to be made before things got more confusing and awkward. It takes a lot of character and guts to do that. I believe the feeling is always there even in small amounts BUT those small amounts could either completely vanish or grow so big that it could go out of control. I’ve seen both happening .. It could also be turned into a very beautiful and long lasting true friendship BUT with THAT small amount which will always be there in you…

  2. Jesus Perez (@OhMy_Jesus)

    Thanks man I really appreciate it. I totally get what you’re saying. To be honest they’re no feelings there but if they were I still would’ve said no because I wouldn’t want to use a “friendship” to try something out again. It didn’t work out so I’ll leave it at that. And that’s what I’m getting at, it’s bad to use friendship to try and hook up with someone.

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